I have to be brutally honest here and admit that one of the reasons I love to drive across country to a race is that it gives me a guilty free “get out of jail” card to eat fast food. I mean what else are you going to eat in the middle Lower Corn Sucker Iowa?
I’m sure there must be a completely charming and delicious family owned restaurant somewhere along one of the many exits of I-80, but the chances of finding it while zipping by at 80-mph are as likely as me winning this weekend’s Chicago Triathlon.
So with a wry smile on my face I pulled into the nearest Wendy’s parking lot and made a dash for the burger, fries and frosty.
But my timing was wrong and I got stuck in the zigzag line behind a half a dozen other people. So here’s where the Combo Conundrum comes into play.
I’m waiting to order and salivating at the notion of a fast burger and fries when I notice that many of the folks who come to order are completely perplexed by the Wendy’s Combo menu.
They seem to be at a complete loss, or at best mystified by what to order. When you think about it this is pretty amazing as Wendy’s only servers a couple of different types of burgers from their combo menu.
The only significant choice you have is if you want cow or chicken meat between the two buns, and yet these folks are completely bamboozled by this decision.
The guy in front of me finally decides on the cow burger after like a million years of scratching his head, and the counter woman asks him what he wants to drink with that combo.
So get this…he actually says, “What do you have?”
“Well sir we have fizzy bottom burp aid, and purple penguin juice, or a lot of people like butt burn power cola.”
I’m just guessing here but they probably have one of the only two Cola’s in the world (diet and regular) along with some Sprite or Mountain Dew (diet and regular) and some sort of brightly colored kid’s drink.
That would be the exact same thing that they have in every single one of the three billion fast food restaurants along every inch of every interstate in the United States.
Next race I think I’ll fly. At least that way I can sit in comfortably and read my magazine while the guy next to me ponders the great question of the day...whether he indeed wants ice and peanuts with his diet or regular Coke.
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